Anyone who has ever been to China is well aware of the prodigious effort it takes to decipher the myriad street, retail and attraction signs. China has gone to tremendous lengths to make the country more tourist-friendly, with notable strides made in the wake of the 2008 Summer Olympic Games. Still, somebody somewhere in the PRC government needs to take a stand and demand more stringent translation standards.
Of course, if signs all over China were suddenly made legible to English readers, we would be robbed of one truly remarkable source of hilarity across the cultural divide. With that in mind, check out some of the most ludicrous examples of “China English”.
This sign makes one major but generous assumption. To categorize everyone as polite is a big leap. To then essentially beg them to hang out on the curb until the green light is too precious.
Who smells a lawsuit? You can never rely on common sense to prevail, so for the love of God, someone needs to give this sign a second look.
We see a coffee cup. Then this: “Time Sex”. What? Look, sometimes you can read between the lines in China. Clearly not in this case however.
If you’re not pregnant and even dare to take a load off in the Chengdu airport, what kind of looks will you get when you stand up? It seems like unless you’re over 90 and suffer from severe arthritis or intestinal flu, you may want to lean on a post. Boy, signs are sure direct in China! How about a pictogram?
5. Hotel car park sign in Tsinghua, Beijing
This entire sign is a total mess. Fence department? War enter the car park? Man. You may want to avoid this hotel in Beijing if you have a rental.
If menus have the ability to whet your appetite, they also have the ability to destroy it and make your stomach lurch. Not to suggest that the food at this Nanjing restaurant will make you ralph, but the menu is certainly no help. Who wants “Food with Ferrouranium”?
7. Sign outside Beijing airport
We knew China was more progressive than ever but this is ridiculous. A car park specifically to get off? Is there not a dearth of open space in urban China? What a sweet and generous gesture by the Beijing government!
8. Random bathroom sign, take one
In the “funny because it’s true” department, this sign takes it to another level. While yes, clearly, it is better to step closer to the urinal for a variety of reasons, is this a point of etiquette officials in China need to inform the male public about?
9. Random bathroom sign, take two
Probably adjacent to the previous sign, this one is a little more philosophical in nature. This is where we poke fun at how different China is from our country, where you would never see a sign like this, unless it was intentionally hilarious. The fact of the matter is that in this case, the sign is meant to be serious. We just don’t get it.
10. Incomprehensible store sign
This sign is a complete and total puzzlement. Another example that if we had some knowledge of Chinese characters, we could indentify the horrendous mistake. Obviously, nobody’s “skin” has to sweep a damn thing. But then again, why even bother to point that out? Does the store have a problem with people being disrespectful of Uncle John’s efforts to maintain order and keep a tidy floor? We need to know!
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